Trying to Wrap My Head Around Today

I'm writing this while watching the horrific coverage of the Boston Marathon explosions. Part of me wants to throw up, part of me wants to cry and part of me wants to go into a rage against whoever is responsible for this senseless act against members of my beloved running community.

As a runner, this is one of those events that I'll never forget where I was when I first heard the news. For the past three days I have been reading and seeing the tweets, Facebook posts and Instagram photos from my friends and brands I follow on social media, so when I looked up at the TV in the shop I was in and saw the headline that two explosions at the Boston Marathon had taken place, my heart dropped. I immediately started texting my friends and former colleagues that I knew where there to see if they were okay. Thankfully everyone from Fleet Feet Nashville were okay and 30 minutes later I received a text from my friend Kyle, who works for Runner's World and had Facebooked a few hours before the race that he was going on a 15 mile run along the course before the it started, letting me know that he had left the finish line area just FIVE MINUTES before the explosions took place. I get chills just thinking about it.

In 2007 I wrote a paper in college describing what it's like to run the Chicago Marathon. I said it's the one day out of the year in the city where people of all walks of life unite to cheer on the 40,000 people that take to the street to run 26.2 miles. My first marathon was legit magical. After I crossed that finish line I felt like I could do anything. I remember crossing the finish line and crying because I was so happy that all my hard work had paid off. That single event gave me more self-esteem than I could have ever imagined and no one, absolutely no one, could ever take that feeling away from me. Anyone who has ever crossed that marathon finish line knows exactly what I am talking about and to think that so many people were deprived of this amazing feeling makes me sick. Running a marathon is a life changing event and while you're running, before this day, to even fathom that someone could instill such terror during the event is unimaginable. The marathon is supposed to be a safe and happy event. Bad things are allowed to happen any other day, just not on marathon day.

Me and my dear friends Kristin, Casey and Kristen while running the 2007 Chicago Marathon. This picture makes me smile every time I see it

All that being said, I cannot even begin to wrap my head around what has happened today. I feel like my friends and family have been attacked. I would run into a burning building for my running friends. There is an unexplainable bond that happens between people when they spend every Saturday morning together doing their long runs for marathon training. Watching the footage of the first explosion happen and seeing people run immediately towards the destruction to help their fellow runners makes me hate humanity a little less and reminds me why I run. I don't run for the medals, I don't run so I can brag about how many marathons I've completed and I don't run so I can eat whatever I want. I run because I love being a part of the running community.

My thoughts are with everyone in Boston and there is a special place in hell for those who attacked members of my running community today.

My 2012 Fleet Feet Nashville group celebrating our Country Music Marathon finish

I would run through a burning building for every single one of these people